Loss in victory (marriage)

Can you imagine a worse or depressing situation like winning a race yet you actually lose? I know many are actually thinking if that is possible, I am not talking about a consolation game where victory is useless but am talking about a real fight where you beat the competition yet the title goes to the loser.

The year is 2003, the wedding was a hit and it was still fresh in everyone’s mind. Friends, family and the community was a buzz from the wedding, you could see the excitement and joy in the couples eyes, life was good. The husband was a well off professional, the wife a University graduate Nurse, life was as sweet as it can get for a newly married couple.

The excitement of the wedding was slowly wearing off, they had to learn to live as husband and wife and in that came the fights. They would become so verbally abusive to each other so much that the words used were nasty and demeaning, it became a situation that who ever had the best abusive word. Phrase or expression won the fight.

One day the husband snapped, he had been building up words of abuse over a period of time and that night he had made up his mind he would not let her win. It had been. Week of holding back, enough was enough, he was going to tell her what was on his heart, he did. He poured his heart out and really, clearly won, sending his wife into deprecation. Did he really win? His wife lost respect for him, she would not care for the marriage anymore, did he really win?

It does not help to win a battle at the expense of your loved one, family or close relationships. There is nothing to win when you lose the things that matter in your life. Place the needs of your wife or husband on a throne if you have to, they matter. Do not go for the tit for a tat shouting or scolding game with your spouse, chose to love them no matter what. It is better to love, it is better to be offence free than full if it, make the choice.

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