Speak your mind (Revamp)

Following my earlier article a few weeks back about speaking your mind, I received numerous comments and emails requesting that I expand that article a little more. Challenge accepted, well, I have been thinking of how I can write anything else on that topic as I poured my heart out the first time round, I think I got it.

To be honest, children are more than precious to me than money, its amazing other people see them as a distraction when they are chasing careers. I ask myself this question “If my parents had not sacrificed for me, where would I be today?” You cannot ask me not to give my all to my kids, you cannot ask yourself to do any less for kids because they are the future. Why would anyone see kids as a hindrance, barrier or distraction?

Here is my reasoning (albeit I am biased towards kids) – growing up you made adjustments at every stage of your life and development. First you had to adjust each trimester when your mother was pregnant with you, you had to adjust to life outside the womb, you had to learn how to eat solids, you moved on to crawling, walking, running and yes, you even had to learn to go to the bathroom not your pants. What is my point? Life is full of Adjustments, you cannot go through life with no sacrifices, you cannot expect major life events with no major adjustments. Well, I stand corrected, a few people expect life to be a bed of roses, they expect everything to fit a tiny box of their reality and expect that life should revolve around their expectations. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, life is not that damned down.

I believe that you have to accept the consequences of your decisions, actions or both. Everything in life, every action has a subsequent and equal reaction irrespective of when it appears, there is still a reaction. Your decisions have consequences, good or bad, learn to accept them. It is annoying that one can live carelessly and then cry foul when life comes back for payback, if you live with no care for the future don’t be shocked when life requests the cost for the living you did. Let me simplify it for you, you can live as long as you want and if you are careless to live as if there is no tomorrow, do not scream when tomorrow comes. 

Plan your life accordingly, do not move until you are certain on where you are going and what you will do when you get there. In my books, those who are inconvenienced by the birth of their children are basically people who live without a care for the future, people who are selfish and care nothing for the balance of life. If your parents gave you all in life that they could afford, reciprocate, give back the same way to your kids. I would never have kids in my old age because I want to enjoy the things they enjoy so I had to have my kids in my young age. I would have had them at an even younger age if I had matured fast enough, yes, maturity held me back from marriage. I was wise enough to know that if I was dumb enough to marry immature, that marriage would be my burden to bear and that would cost me more than I ever bargained. I sought wisdom, I gave myself to knowledge and when I was ready and knew that I can move forward, I married the girl of my dreams and we made our life decision together, kids followed and we give them our all. 

The Greatest success in my books is when you can pass on to the next generation an opportunity for them to make their own future. My dad was not the richest person in the world but what he gave me was more than money, he gave me the opportunity to be me and that is all I needed in life. Now I get the opportunity to do the same for my kids and I do it with no excuses, I love the fact that I can have kids and that I get to rise them, its a privilege and an honour to be a father, I take it and will make it work for my kids. 

One of the emails I received asked if I had any education and if I was ambitious in life, it seems to say that I was not educated enough and ambitious in enough to chase my dreams no matter what. I chose to ignore that because the simplest way to challenge a fact is to insult, besides, even if it were true that I am not ambitious, I am smart enough to write what can be read even by that person, educated or not I make sense.  I will never write on something I have no experience or connect to, I will never speak as a fourth party to an issue, most if not all I write is something that I have either experienced or am experiencing. 

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